Open To Life

Being open to life has always been easy for us. My husband and I have always wanted a house full of children. We have thankfully never had any fertility issues and overall I have had relatively good pregnancies. We have been blessed. Really  blessed with six beautiful children. Saying "yes" to God has been simple. Sometimes exhausting with six children in nine years. But over all simple and easy. No problem.

I love my big family. Even with all of the work and chaos, I love it. I have learned to deal with the looks and comments by others when we go out. The looks that say "Have you lost your mind?" Catching them count my children with their eyes. Or the comments, " Are they ALL yours?" I had one woman ask the "are they all yours" question, and then she looked me in the eye for a very long time and said "Just wait until they are teenagers. Good luck with that!" These comments always baffle me. I really do have sweet children. Overall they are really well behaved when we go out.

When asked the question "Do you want more?" I would answer quietly as to not draw anymore attention. "Well, yes. We are open to life." After the offending commenter leaves I always assure the children that we feel so blessed to have each and every one of them.  And that unfortunately these days, our society does not value children as they should. They have lost site that children are a huge blessing from God and the most wonderful gift in the world! As Blessed Mother Theresa says "How can there be too many children? That is like saying there are to many flowers..."

I have just recently had two very close miscarriages. The first on the night of my beloved mothers memorial mass. and the second on my daughters 9th birthday. My meek, quiet "yes" to God was met with "No, not now." My husband and I are hugely saddened by these losses. We have wept over these babies that we will not get to hold in this lifetime. But I trust He knows best, and my prayer is "Jesus, I trust in You." I truly, truly know now. To the depths of my soul. Children are a HUGE blessing. The greatest gift we could ever hope to receive. We are not in control of life. We can not say when we want that life to happen. Our society would like us to think the opposite. The Author of life, our Almighty and Merciful God determines when. He knows best.

Now when asked the question by others "Do you want more?" I realize I am also answering God. And my meek "well, yes" is replaced with a resounding "YES! Yes, we absolutely want more. They are a gift and the biggest blessing."

Comments

[5Gustos]

I will offer my public condolences for your recent miscarriages, friend. I have also come to realize the true value of children and God's plan for us, with the knowledge that mine are all 3 miracles from Above. And yes, your kids ARE sweet. You are a lovely family.

[Tiffany]

This was beautifully written...I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriages. I know it must be heartbreaking. I will be praying for you to be healed and for another little one. I sooo wish that my husband had the same sentiment. I love children and would love a houseful. Not sure how I would handle it but I know God would give me the strength. Thank you for sharing your heart.

[Leisa]

Beautifully written. I am sorry for your loss. This topic is close to my heart at the moment, so it was really nice to read your sentiments. Praying for your next baby.

[Melissa]

I have some babies in heaven too, K. It's a wonderful comfort to know that they are in the arms of our Maker. Thinking of you!! Thanks for sharing!

[Marianne]

We have children the exact ages of yours (except my 2yo won't be three until March). I love your post and I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriages.

[Debi Humston]

Thank you so much for sharing your heart. God has really used this issue in my life to humble me and truly allow me to see his hand in my life. As much as I desire to be in control, he really is the author of life.
We have suffered miscarriage after our first child and struggled through 4 years of infertility after our 2nd child. As painful as it was, I know in my heart that God's plans are greater than I can imagine. After resolving that our family would be complete with 2 children...God has blessed us with 2 more! My prayers are with you.
Debi H.

[jason]

God bless you!
I love the way you write. I cried.
You rock!
I don't mean to say "I know how you feel" - but, Jessie and I have children in heaven as well. I can't begin to say how much you guys mean to those who know y'all. You're all very dear to us.

[SHEAFMom]

My friend, how much I ache for you. The loneliness within one’s own body is a feeling I prayed you would never know. I am comforted with the knowledge that you are able to fill that emptiness with our Lord through the Eucharist. I know, that as we and our children here are the closest of friends, so too, our little ones are together praying for us and their siblings as they praise God face to face, as we long to do. I know that although our motherly arms ache to hold the little ones we so desperately love, Our Blessed Mother has enveloped them into her arms as she presented them to her Son. I am awed meditating on the infiniteness of God. His love for us is so profound that He gave to us the gift of creating, not just the fleeting things of the world, but the eternal, a new person, a soul that will live on beyond our imagination. Whether we have them for a week, 9 months, 20 years, or all our natural lives they are for God. They will live, because of Him, forever. At the moment the Lord blessed us with new life they were made in His Image and Likeness to live with Him forever in Peace and Happiness. At the moment of their creation their eternity began. It is awesome to remember we will have eternity to spend together, sharing the Lambs Supper as God has prepared for those who love Him. I find comfort that the Lord provides even now that at the moment of Consecration, Heaven and Earth collide and we are together, one Body, One people, One Communion of saints, Worshipping Him as He has designed. I look forward to the day when we will sit at the Wedding feast and the veil is lifted from our eyes and together we worship Him, our Bridegroom, our Savior, our Lord. I love you and as always I lift you up to our Lord in prayer. May He continue to give you strength and the Peace only He can give.